Patricia Marino

We have all been the “Others”

Book Release


Reflections of a First-Generation’s Daughter on Belonging, Democracy, and a New American Dream

Bonus Available Here

“I searched my own family’s history to take stock of how we can move forward as a community, as a nation, and as global citizens. Improving ourselves is hard work — trench work — but each generation has to move the needle forward. Understanding where we come from and what we bring to the table means we can have a path to peace.”


Book Release:

When I began this book, it was intended to be a memoir about my dad and family members who have long passed into memory. I didn’t know where this writing would take me. As I wrote, I reflected on the lessons my parents taught me – ones they shared not only in words (and boy were there WORDS!), but also the lessons that were inherent in my parents’ actions and expectations.

As I continued writing, I began to think about my parents’ place in the history of the United States, and, as a result, my place.

I started wondering why some immigrants are successful in fully assimilating into this place we call America, but why others continue to struggle. I recalled reading an article in the Los Angeles Times quoting the professional basketball coach Doc Rivers: “It’s amazing why we keep loving this country, and this country does not love us back.” (August 25, 2020, by Andrew Greif).

This is the 21st century, and even though Native Americans and African Americans have been here for more than 400 years, an underlying fear — and sometimes downright hatred of “the others” — persists in our culture. My family’s immigrant story, my childhood growing up in Chicago during the 1960s, and my years of teaching high school history compelled me to dig further. I wanted to explore the “why” of prevailing attitudes to gain a better understanding of how we might bridge the political and social divide in this country. I wanted to explore ways we can improve the full measure of American democracy for all.


“Poignant, thought-provoking, and delightful!”

Valerie Miles, DMin, PhD; Professor, Ministerial Leadership & Practical Theology, Graduate Theological Union; Core Doctoral Faculty, Religion & Practice Department, Theology & Ethics Department
“Once in a great while, there comes a book that speaks accessibly, powerfully, and humanely to a crucial issue of the time. We Have All Been the ‘Others’ is that book for our time. A relatable memoir that vividly recounts what it was like to grow up as an Italian immigrant family in Chicago and a compelling, clear-eyed reflection on racial division in America, this book both holds up a mirror to what is unlovely and hateful in our common history, and helps us simultaneously to see and fashion a redemptive path. Deeply researched, laced with humor, propelled by winsome narrative, this daughter’s nuanced tribute to her larger-than-life father compels us to remember the commonalities, both good and bad, that bind us as families, communities, and citizens. And at a time when our country appears relentlessly polarized, We Have All Been the ‘Others’ regenerates hope and offers practical pathways for empathetic living in a diverse world.”
Glynda A. Hull, Elizabeth H. and Eugene A. Shurtleff Chair; Faculty Director, Undergraduate Studies, and Center for Teaching and Learning School of Education, University of California, Berkeley

Patricia Marino